The twins at {18 months}

18 months!  Where’s that time gone?!  And who’s replaced my babies with two strapping toddlers?!

18 months feels like a strange milestone.  At 12 months the boys still felt very much like babies whereas now they’re confidently walking {running}, climbing {up big slides eeeeek!} and starting to talk and understand more and more every day {tractor! duck! hiya!}.  Suddenly they have an air of independence about them - putting on their own wellies or investigating new areas of the park, all of which brings with it huge changes for us too – trying to balance safety versus giving them space to explore and make {measured} mistakes.  Learning how to gently discipline and guide their actions whilst keeping our heads and patience {deep breaths} and re-arranging our house {again} as newly perceived dangers appear {how did you get THAT?!}  New territory again – no wonder my brain hurts!  But I have to say, for the most part I am LOVING it!  Bye bye pukey babies, hello daredevil toddlers!

Oliver and Noah {18 months}

Buggy-free walks:  So for us the buggy is still a must have at this stage but it’s also really nice being able to go out buggy-free {although I always have it in the car boot just in case!}.  We love to go for walks around the block or I might drive into town and we’ll investigate the lake and stop for a snack at the local coffee shop.  Even little things like walking from the car into twins club without all the baby paraphernalia makes life so much easier!  As I tend to be on my own a lot with the boys I usually to use reins but as I’m getting braver and they’ve actually really good at holding my hands so I tend to tuck them into their hoods and have them more as a back-up for when we’re near a road/water etc.  We use a combination of the Lindam reins and Little Life Backpacks, the latter of which I found better for when they were more sturdy on their feet.  I also love to let them have some independence too and will let them go ‘freelance’ whenever it’s deemed safe to do so. 

Talking:  Oh my goodness our boys have so much character, something which comes through even more so now they’re starting to talk.  They crack me up and make my heart swell all at the same time - in my mind there is absolutely nothing cuter than Noo saying "da-deeee" or Ollie "noooo-dles" {heart melting}.  They’ll say “hiya” to anyone and everyone when we’re out and about and Ollie will introduce his brother to people, pointing to him saying "noodles" haha!  They come out with new stuff all the time, usually mimicking {mind what you say!} but at the moment most things are a duck, tractor {including the postman’s trolley} or da-deeee.  On that note they are absolutely obsessed with daddy {rolls eyes}.  They’ll literally sit and stroke photos of him lovingly but when asked “where’s mummy?” they're like “who?”  So much so that my friend Alex and I have an ongoing joke that they actually think I’m their Nanny haha! 

It’s also true that toddlers understand a lot more than they can say.  If you ask Noo to put piglet in the wheelbarrow chances are he’ll do it and if you mention the ‘S’ {snack} or ‘L’ {lunch} word you better be sure you follow up on it because they will hunt you down until you give it to them!

Discipline:  Babies aren’t born with the knowledge of what’s right and what’s wrong.  This may sound obvious but it’s worth remembering as you step into the realms of how and when to discipline your child.  It’s up to us to teach our children what’s acceptable and what’s not {as well as what’s potentially dangerous} and every family will have their own take on how to tackle this subject.  As with most things it takes a bit of trial and error and you learn to pick your battles – somethings we were quite strict on to begin with we’ve now relaxed a bit on and other things {such as biting and hitting} have become ‘big no's’.  Staying consistent isn’t always easy but we’re trying to start as we mean to go on and even though an 18 month old may not be able to compute the whole “if I hit I will get told off and therefore I won’t hit” mentality, I’d rather start working on that now rather than when they’re older and running completely riot.  I’m also a fan of explanation and distraction, e.g. “we don’t climb the table because it’s unsafe, why don’t we play with truck instead?”, asking them to say sorry {through a cuddle or kiss if appropriate} and giving warnings such as “you've got 5 minutes then we’re going to go”.  Again they may not understand it all and nothing is fool proof but hopefully good habits to get into and above all remember that patience is definitely a virtue.  Losing your s**t in the middle of Tesco isn't fun for anyone {more deep breaths}. 

Sleep:  Sleep is still a contentious subject in the Hully household.  How our day goes is pretty much dependant on how well the boys {and mummy and daddy} have slept.  They still have one daytime nap {see routine below} and this still has the ability to make my anxiety levels soar.  9 times out of 10 they will go down to sleep at around about the same time every day and I'm pretty much on edge until they do.  I'm not even sure why I get so worried about it.  Eventually they will grow out of daytime naps but for now I still feel like it's a really important time of our day.  Same with bedtime.  They used to be asleep by 6:30pm no problem but since transitioning to an afternoon nap bedtime has become much more hit and miss.  Because of this I’ve changed their routine slightly to include more wind down time {no more nakey rampage} but the line between tired enough to sleep and becoming overtired is a fine one and we’re still trying to find a bedtime routine that works.  On an average night Ollie will take longer to go to sleep but will sleep through and Noo will be up once or twice in the night but will usually go back to sleep until 7-7:30.  This I can cope with.  When they are teething or unwell we can be up 3-4 times a night for ~20mins at a time and occasionally they’ll come into our bed when we’re too shattered to function otherwise.  Then come morning  toddlers have an uncanny way of waking up full of beans ready for the day ahead regardless of how much {or little} sleep you’ve all had and so life goes on.  Dig deep my friends!  And drink coffee.  Lots of coffee.  Worth also noting that they are still using a dummy at nap and bedtime.  This is partly why I think Noo cries in the night as he can't {be bothered to} find his dummy.  Rod and back comes to mind. 

- Routine:  We still have the boys in a routine for the most part although I’d say it’s getting easier to be more flexible as they get older.  So here’s how our day generally goes:

7:00-7:30:  Good morning!   Change nappy and put on PJ bottoms

7:30: Breakfast – 5oz warm milk in Munchkin 360 miracle cups followed by cereal and fresh fruit with splash of whole milk

8:00-9:00:  Playtime {mummy shower and dressed}

9:00:  Boys wash faces and dressed

9:30: Snack {like fruit or fruit loaf with peanut butter} and water

9:30/10:00:  Out for morning activity {twins club/walk/soft  play}

12:00:  Lunch {usually something simple like sandwiches, crisps, fruit and rice pudding}

12:30:  Nappy change {if not needed earlier} and play

1:30-3:00:  Nap

3:00:  Cuddles on sofa and snack {like malted milk biscuit or Organix Goodies soft oaty bars and water}

3:30: Afternoon activity {buggy-free walk or longer walk to the shops in the buggy, painting, gardening}

5:00:  Tea {something cooked like chicken pie, sweet potato mash and peas then yoghurt}

5:30-6:00:  Play and In the Night Garden whilst I get bedtime stuff ready

6:00:  Bath and into PJs

6:25:  Into sleeping bags, 6oz warm milk {in the 360 miracle cups again} and a story {or 2}

6:40:  Cuddle, lights out and night night

~7:15-30:   Asleep {in theory!}

- Top buys:

- Calpol vapour plug:  A bit costly but great for when they’re full of cold to help keep noses clear overnight

- Little Life Back-packs:  Double up as reins and they can carry their own stuff {as well as looking super cute}

- Puddle suits:  Keeps them warm and dry on rainy days and cleanwhen pottering in the garden and you can’t be bothered to change their clothes again

- Joie Aire Twin Buggy:  Lightweight, loads of basket storage and the boys love the space it gives them to sit up and {when the mood takes them} have a cuddle haha


In summary:  So as hard as having two toddlers can be I love watching the development of their little {big!} personalities.  They're boisterous and brave but also kind, helpful, gentle and empathetic.  They squeal with glee and giggle hysterically but also whisper and quietly observe.  They dance around the living room full of beans then pull their bean bags across the room to sit and look at books and share their snack together.  They wriggle and fight but then offer condolence when the other is upset.  They hold hands in the car and play peekaboo.  They wait at the bottom of the stairs whilst the other is still napping.  They are a whirlwind and a breath of fresh air all at the same time.  My two little pumpkins.

Best Buddies

Early days {the 4th trimester} {Part 2}

Oh hi there!  Ok so the fact that I haven’t posted on the blog for about 6 months is probably a good indication of how my life has been lately – busy busy!  If it’s any consolation I have blogged loads in my head – just not managed to sit down and actually post anything.  Is there such a thing as bloggers block?  So anyways, the boys are now 14 months old {where did that go ey?} and I finally feel like I’m ready to get back on track with my tales of a wanna-be perfect housewife {a life twintastic} J

So let’s catch up and go back to April 2015 where our new little family has just been discharged from hospital – eeek!

Ok, so long story short the routine we had going in hospital pretty much went to pot as soon as we stepped through our front door.  Doh!

The babies would still feed roughly every 3 hours most the day and nap in between but then any time after 4pm they would become really unsettled, cry {and cry, and cry}, then fed every 1-2 hours until morning.  We ended up co-sleeping with the babies on our bed – something we felt very anxious about, even after talking through with my midwife about how to make it safer.  To this day Mr H will still wake up in the night in a panic and check if there’s a baby on the bed we've forgotten about!  At first I tried to stay awake all night watching back to back episodes of Family Guy then try to catch an hour or so of sleep here and there during the day between feeds.  But then sheer exhaustion caught up with me.  We ended up co-sleeping until we managed to get them to settle for at least part of the night in their moses baskets when they were about 5 weeks old. 

In the morning it was an achievement just to get out of bed.  It felt like I was constantly covered in babies in a cycle of feeding, changing and cat napping.  Mr H would bring up a breakfast tray and I’d make sure I got showered and dressed {which by the way I can now do in like 10 mins} every morning whilst he took over baby duty.  We would then all eventually migrate downstairs with the babies in their moses baskets.  During the day we’d get back into our 3 hourly feed routine {still breast feeding then topping up with a cup of expressed milk at this point} and at night I’d breast feed on demand.  If they woke up I fed them.  The don’t call it a milk coma for nothing!  I kept a record of feeds in a notebook and fed them on average 12 times a day.  Each! 
 

My life with newborn twins!

Being a new mum is hands down the most amazing but hardest thing I have ever experienced.  I had no idea what I was doing.  I was Tired {exhausted} and at times it felt like all they would do is cry and I found that pretty soul destroying.  I didn’t know why they were crying.  I was waiting for my mummy instincts to kick in but no, nadda, nothing.   I was stressed and anxious.  My friends and family would offer to take the babies out for a walk so I could rest but I was too anxious to let them out of my sight and I’d literally hear them crying up the road and feel sick to my stomach. 

Mr H went back to work when the boys were 3 weeks old and my anxiety levels peaked.  I was home alone with the babies for the first time from anytime between 6 and 9am until ~11pm.  I’d be on the sofa with them asleep on me and I'd just sit there for hours.  I was constantly on google or messaging other new mummy friends for advice and comfort {oh hey Rose and my twin mummy pals!} .  Looking back now I’d like to think I’d be able to read their signs a bit better but at the time I didn’t have a clue.  It became a very lonely place to be. 

Luckily I have a very loving network of friends and family.  My mum {aka super mum!} took charge and made sure someone was with me to help out, hold a baby or just be there for at least part of the day every day whilst Mr H was working.  I would still get very anxious and upset but knowing someone would be with me at some point during the day helped more than anyone could ever know.  This is something I will be eternally grateful for!  I had some really dark days and you may be thinking – classic case of post-natal depression – which it may well have been.  Or it may have just been the fact that being a new mummy was bloomin hard!!  The fact that I found it so hard was a complete shock and in a way that was the most upsetting thing.  Looking back at photos I look like I’m on a totally different planet!  I loved these two little beings more than words can express but they were still also so alien to me.  Becoming a parent is life changing.  It’s 24/7.  It’s not all doom and gloom obviously but I have no shame in being honest about how hard I found those early weeks and months. 

As the weeks went on things slowly improved and my confidence grew.  12 weeks was a real turning point for us.  We’d still have really tough days and I still suffered from almost crippling anxiety but we were now getting into our groove and starting to get to know each other.  The mummy instincts finally started to make an appearance {it was about time!} and I was enjoying my babies J  People often ask me how do you do it?  But the reality is that, as with a lot of things, it’s hard but you just have to get on with it as best you can.  Even now when the boys are 14 months I get anxious but the good definitely out ways the bad and we're lucky to have two pretty awesome little dudes J 

One of the main things that really helped me was routine.  There are a lot of pros and cons when it comes to this matter and everyone has their own opinions but for me it gave me the structure and stability I needed so very badly and I think it has made my babies happier and more settled {more on routines coming soon}.  

Other things which helped was the realisation that our babies suffered from reflux and establishing a good nap and bedtime routine {more on bedtime routine coming soon}.

Top tips for new mummies:

-          Try to get washed and dressed every day.  You will feel so much better for it!

-      Ask for and listen to advice but then make up your own mind -  ultimately you know what's best for you and your babies

-          Get out of the house every day before you go insane!  Even if it's a 10 minute stroll around the block in your pjs!

-         Accept help and lower your housework standards.  You may be super mum but trying to do everything including keeping the house up to pre-baby standards is likely to be a losing battle without a little help. I think that our home is now much more homely and welcoming since the babies arrived.

-         Befriend other new mummy friends.  I was lucky that I was pregnant at the same time as one of my closest friends {hey sweetcorn} and we ended up having our babies a day apart.  3am messages were pretty much the norm!  I also joined a twins club and this was one of the best things I’ve done simply because, as you can imagine, having multiples brings its own set of challenges and I found it really helpful and reassuring having a network other twin mums to talk to J

-          I googled pretty much everything early on.  Sometimes it was helpful but probably more often than not it wasn’t. 

-          On that note – don’t be afraid of calling your midwife/health visitor/doctor for advice! 

-         Make sure you have your essentials close at hand.  Being stuck on the sofa covered in sleeping babies with the tv remote just out of reach and knowing there is a giant bar of galaxy sat on the kitchen work surface is not fun.

 -    Remember to look after yourself!  Eat, drink, sleep.  Sounds basic but you'd be surprised how quickly they go out the window with a newborn in the house!  Accept all offers of food and stock up on microwave meals.  You can worry about losing the baby weight later!

-         Everything is for a time and a season.  Babies change so quickly and the round the clock feeds, the sleepless nights and all that comes with it won’t last forever.  The challenges that come with parenthood may change but ultimately what you're struggling with right now you’ll probably have forgotten about in a few months!

 Top buy:

-          Buggy.   Your buggy will become your new best friend so it’s important to buy the right one for you. The research is worth it!

We bought an iCandy pear from friends of ours who also have twin boys which was ideal!  This was a ‘front and back’ buggy {as opposed to a side by side} which came with two flat pram inserts and two seat inserts plus had adaptors to fit two maxi-cosi car seats and make a travel system.  The base folded down small enough to fit in my tiny boot.  The large basket was really and inflated tyres meant we could pretty much take it anywhere J

We used this buggy for a good year before deciding to buy a side by side Joie Twin Aire as the twins had outgrown their car seats making the travel system redundant and I wanted something lighter and thought the boys would enjoy being side by side more now that they were older.  And I love it!
 

 

 

Early days {the 4th trimester} {Part 1}

The babies have arrived, so what’s next?

After lots of cuddles, tears, routine checks, possibly the best shower of your life (seriously better than a post ‘I’ve just crawled through 10 feet of mud’ shower) and copious amounts of tea and toast we were all cleared to move to the maternity ward at 2:30am on Sunday morning (a bit like getting in from the craziest night out you’ve ever had).  Then went straight to bed to recover right?  Ha.  Hahahahahhaha.  This is one Saturday night hangover that won’t be slept off.  We decided it would be best for Mr H to go home and get some sleep so he could be more use the next day (poor man had had a hard day and can’t cope without sleep….!) and leave the babies to me and the midwives. 

Your body has been through a hugely traumatic experience and your emotions are shot.  You still can’t get your head around what’s just happened in the last 24 hours  (even though you've been preparing for months) and you’re on a massive comedown from the copious amounts of painkillers pumped into your system.  All you want to do is curl up into a little ball and sleep for the next 12 hours.  But now you have these two little people sharing a cot next to your bed who you simply can’t stop staring at in wonder.  You know them but they are new to you.  Strangers you’re yet to get to know.  Part of you but somehow so alien. 

Just as your eyelids drop a baby lets out a heart retching cry.  Your mummy instincts kick in and you’re up with your baby in your arms before you can say more tea and toast please.  This tiny little being so fragile and, apparently, not at all happy with life out in the big wide world.  His brother still sleeping peacefully.  Is he still breathing.  Is he warm enough?  What if he’s too warm?  Is he hungry?  Does he need a new nappy?  How do you even change a nappy?  How do you know what this new little person wants?  Why aren’t my mummy instincts working?!

You ring the buzzer and in comes the midwife (thank the Lord for midwives! In fact thank the Lord for all hospital staff!).  She helps you feed, change his nappy and puts your mind at rest.  Ok so the baby is sleeping again.  Time for more staring.  Your eyelids drop.  The other baby wakes.  Welcome to the 4th trimester. 

Needless to say those early days were a bit of  blur.  We were in hospital for 5 days and after O dropped too much weight we were put on a strict 3 hourly feed schedule.  To be honest I loved the routine!  I felt like I had some control over this completely new and chaotic life.  Alarm set for 11:40pm, wake up, potter to the hospital feeding room, sterilise equipment and take tub of previous expressed milk out of the fridge.  Back to babies, wake them up, change nappies (to their tandem chorus of ‘why have you woken me up’ in A minor), ring the midwife buzzer, tandem breast feed by 12am (with some help from the midwife), then top up with expressed milk cup feed.  Attempt to wind babies (aka the impossible task), quick cuddle and put back down back to sleep by 12:50.  Express for 30 mins.  Wash up equipment, label and put expressed milk in the fridge.  Back to room and in bed by 1:40.  Alarm set for 2:40.  Repeat.  Forever. 

Ok so maybe not forever but this basically became our life for the foreseeable future.  Our babies fed every three hours for months.  We changed their nappies after every feed.   We had a system, worked as a team, slept whenever possible.  We could do this! 

But apparently hospitals are full of fairy dust that makes babies sleep.  Coming home was a different story!  (watch out for part 2 coming soon!)

 

Two little sausage rolls

 

Top Tips:

-          Everyone says this but seriously get as much sleep and rest before your baby/babies arrive because newborns are HARDWORK!

-          Pack your hospital bag early and try to keep it packed i.e. have a spare deodorant rather than expecting to remember to throw in the one you use every day last minute

-          As you approach your due date it’s nice to have a bit of a pamper but try to be relaxed about keeping your dignity

-          Buy a maternity/nursing bra with a bit of room – by approx.. day 3 your boobs will think they’re getting ready to audition for a FHM shoot

-          Make the most out of the hospital staff – they are amazing and a fountain of knowledge and experience

-          Try to get out of your hospital room to potter around the ward everyday – my favourite time of day was breakfast.  I’d wheel the babies out to the day room in their cot and eat my body weight in toast.  After a long night it was a.maz.ing.  Plus gives you an opportunity to meet expectant and new mums and have a good natter and feel a bit more yourself again

-          Think carefully about how you want to share your news and who you’d like to visit you in hospital.  You may think you can’t wait to show off your new bundle/bundles of joy but don’t underestimate how you may feel post birth i.e. like you’ve been 10 rounds with Mike Tyson

 

Top buy:

-          V-pillow.  Seriously the best thing I ever bought.  Great during pregnancy for your aching back and to use as a maternity pillow between your legs or under your huge bump at night and ideal for feeding in the early days.  I still use mine to prop the babies up to feed and now they’re sitting up I use them as a buffer in case they topple over.  And you can pick them up quite cheap from amazon! 

We're expecting! {the unexpected} {Sept 2014}

On 9th September 2014 I had the most horrific stomach bug.  Or so I thought....

After 12 hours of puking (nice) Mr H said to me "are you sure you're not pregnant" to which I replied "if this is what morning sickness feels like I hope not!"  Ha.  Hahahahahahahaha.  Two pregnancy tests, a trip to the doctors and a third test just to be sure (you know, the one that states 'pregnant' or 'not pregnant') later I text Mr H.  I think it's pretty safe to say that we're expecting!

Daydreaming about being pregnant and actually being pregnant it turns out are very different things.  Daydream pregnancy = gorgeous flowing maternity dresses, glowing skin, pottering around Mothercare picking up cute outfits.  Actually pregnancy = uncomfortable maternity trousers, wanting to hurl at the most inconvenient times, heartburn from hell, piles (yes I went there) and gawking at the price of strollers.  Bye bye Mothercare, hello eBay!

Needless to say I spent the first few weeks of my known pregnancy (7 weeks onwards) pretty much with my head down the toilet.  Hurrah!  We decided to wait a couple of weeks before telling close family and friends.  As expected everyone was over the moon, and actually most people had already guessed - obviously didn't do a fab job of hiding the morning sickness!  I then broke the news to my boss - my exact words after a particularly rough morning being - "Hi Kerry, I'm pregnant and I feel like s**t".  Always one to be subtle. 

I don't know why they call it 'morning' sickness.  It should really be renamed 'can strike at anytime' sickness.  I basically lived off a combination of hula hoops and copious amounts of apple juice in those early days. 

As the 12 week mark loomed the sickness began to subside and I felt pretty good!  We went to our first scan nervous but excited.  Part of me thought they might say that actually I was having a phantom pregnancy and there was actually nothing there.  What actually happened is something I never would have foreseen in a million years!

There I was expectantly lying next to the sonographer watching the screen for a little blob of baby thinking "is that it? Is that our baby?" but they kept moving the scanner and not settling as I expected.  This is it.  This is when they tell me I'm having a phantom pregnancy.  The sonographer then asked the (I assume) more experienced sonographer to take over.  Oh no.  Something's wrong.  I kept staring at the screen.  Aware of Mr H now sitting forward in his chair wringing his hands nervously. 

"Do you have twins in your family?"  she asked.  WTF!!  Cue tears.  Tears of pure shock.  "No" I replied and stared at not one but two little blobs now visible on the screen.  Two little babies.  Twins.  Wow. 

The rest of the scan pretty much pasted in a blur.  We had some photos printed out and were told we'd need to see a consultant and book a separate scan for the following week.  We just sat in the waiting room, pale faced and staring blankly at each other.  Twins.  F**k. 

Then came the fun bit.  "Hi mum - we've just had our scan.  Baby is fine.  Baby number 2 is fine too"  Hehe.  Hehehehehehehehehe.  If telling your loved ones you're pregnant is fun, telling them you're expecting twins is awesome!  Neither of us have twins in the family so it was as big a shock to our nearest and dearest as it was to us.  That is apart from my sister in law who said I was pregnant with twins before I had even told her I was expecting.  A comment I obviously brushed off and didn't think twice about.  She knows her pregnant tummies that girl. 

I pretty much loved every part of my pregnancy from there onwards.  The sickness cleared up.  My skin began to glow, my hair got thicker, my bump grew gorgeous and round and I got to go to about a million scans and see my babies almost fortnightly.  At our 20 week scan we found out we were having two boys and we started preparing things at home, painting the nursery, finding a double buggy that would fit my tiny car (which we did!) and buying and accepting offers of baby clothes.  I remember mentioning to Mr H that we could have babies in 10 weeks time if they came early as so many twins do.  Three days later 7 (!) packages of baby clothes arrived from eBay.  Panic buying much Mr H??   

Nearer the end of my pregnancy things started to get tougher.  Ridiculous heartburn meant I could hardly eat, my bump got heavy and I couldn't comfortably drive or stand for long, my back ached and complications started to crop up which meant more visits to the hospital.  I may as well have lived there really.  But we got there in the end and at 37 weeks I was induced at Gloucester Royal Hospital. 

Then on 11th April 2015 we welcomed our two baby boys into the world - Noah William and Oliver Danny :)